You did it. You did all that you said you would do and more.
Don’t let checking all of the boxes (and creating some new ones) fool you though. YOU put in the work and let it be known you had MUCH to work through.
Barrier after barrier after barrier and you broke through every single one of them even-though it may have taken you a few tries. Around this time last year, I know where you were. Your world had been flipped upside down- feeling the same sensation of pressure rushing to your head with no one to flip you right side up.
You know why? It’s because it was YOU who had to flip YOURSELF right side up.
This is what you learned along the way. You have been waiting for someone to come to your rescue and “Fix it all,” but what you realized is that YOU are the only one who can set the boundaries. YOU are the only one who knows what you need. YOU are the only one who can communicate your needs praying someone hears you.
I love the person you are becoming. I look at you now and see the color back in your life. Just the other day, you unknowingly made this reference out loud to someone. “It’s like I have the sparkle back in my life. I have traded in the neutral and beige for fuchsia and glitter!”
That’s what you did this year. You traded in beige for fuchsia and glitter.
Just before I started typing this letter to you, I read last year’s letter you wrote. I wouldn’t even say that you have grown since last year because what I believe happened is that you finally stopped hiding those wings and became YOU. The little girl with so much fire and energy flew in just like Mary Poppins on your doorstep and you invited her in.
And I’m so glad you did because she needed your warm embrace.
I would have to say 2021 was quite possibly your best year on this Earth. Why? Because you chose you, Jess. You chose you on your own without anyone telling you how to do it. You figured it all out on your own and believed you would after years of feeling like you would never “Feel like this.”
You read somewhere throughout the year that 2020 pushed you to your limits and 2021 was going to make you happy and that is where you are right now…you are happy.
Happiness is often something we take for granted. It isn’t until we misplace it that we so desperately wish we could find it. I like to think we simply misplace our happiness because we ALWAYS have a way of finding it again. What do we do if we can’t find it? We make it…even if we have to make it out of popsicle sticks and Elmer’s glue.
We do have the ability to make our own happy. YOU have your ability to make your own happy, Jessica.
You did so much this year, Jess.
Above it all, YOU gave YOU your all and that is what I am MOST proud of you for. It isn’t easy for people to put themselves first. Society has frowned upon this and made us believe that this is selfish act and egocentric to put ourselves first. Now, I ask you as you read and write this…what is worst than letting yourself down? Pushing yourself aside? Putting other’s feelings before your own? I can’t think of anything.
My hope is that in this new year, you can be an example of what life looks like when you put yourself first and continue to give yourself your all because boo, NO ONE will put you first the way that YOU do…
See you in 2022. Make it your year, sister!