Quality over quantity. One more time…quality over quantity.
Let that sink in for a moment.
In this blog post, I will be touching base on girl squads. Let’s be realistic…#girlsquads are trending. I’ll go as far to say that girl squads have existed since, well, forever!
I had a conversation with someone last week that sparked the inspiration behind this post. We were talking about the pressure young girls feel to be a part of a #squad. There is SO MUCH pressure to fit into a group, unfortunately. Let’s face it…everyone wants to feel like they belong, right?
Disclaimer…I am in no way, form or fashion throwing hate at #girlsquads.
Actually, I personally have been a part of some awesome #girlsquads over the years. I enjoyed these times and wouldn’t change them. My hope is that all girls’ who experience a #squad will be a positive one. There are friendships within the #squad that are more bonded and solidified, but collectively, you identify as one #squad. But, in reality, not everyone in #squads will get along. As stated earlier, I have actively participated in a #squad, so I have a little bit of experience on this topic.
I still remain acquainted with some of these girls. However, over the years, my view of friendship has evolved. At my age now, the definition of true, genuine life-long friendship means something different to me than when I was younger.
I was thinking back on my younger years when we all went to school with the same people for the majority of our adolescence. We became friends with certain people that shared similarities and then groups, now referred to as #squads, were formed.
If you think about it, we really didn’t have a choice of the people we saw everyday because we spent so much time in school. In my opinion, these years are the fundamental years of friendship-making.
You know how it went. You ran up to a fellow classmate on the playground and said something as simple as, “Do you want to be my friend?” Then, before you knew it, you and your new “best friend” would be running on the playground, picking flowers, and making flower crowns! The rest is history! At least, that was how it went for me!!
In our teenage years, we became friends with those who may have played the same sport or belonged to the same club. The common denominator was that we shared a common interest (or maybe a few). Then…BAM! A #squad was formed! (Literally for all of us cheer gals)!
Now that you are older, and after putting it into perspective, ask yourself this… “Did you really have anything else in common with these people? Or was it so important to be a part a #squad?
Maybe it was like my experience that went like this, “Hey! We both can do a back handspring! Let’s be best friends!”
Ladies, I do not know if anyone has told you this, but from my experience, you need to find your fit. By fit, I mean to find your people, even if it doesn’t involve being in a #squad.
I can tell you that some of the friendships I have made in the past have not continued the way I thought they would, and I’ve accepted that. Many of you who are reading this may have experienced this too.
Little did I know, as I grew older, some of my lifelong friends were literally around the corner.
I met most of my life-long friends while I was in college and during my adult years. Many of them came to me when I needed them most and I always think, “I wish we would have been friends since Kindergarten!” Did you ever think that, too?
I know for a fact that the friends who are in my life right now are here to stay, and I will meet more life-long friends along the way. These friends are a part of my life and I am indebted to them for their endless love and support.
If anything, please promise me you won’t force yourself to be friends with someone just because “they are friends with someone else” or because “she may have 5000 followers on Instagram” or because “when you post a photo on Facebook or any other social media platform, someone will think you are a somebody!” You know what I am saying is true and it saddens my heart when someone thinks this is how friendship should be.
For me, the main quality for a true life-long friend is that they always have my best interest at heart, and vice-versa. My friends and I do not compete with each other, usually because we are too busy laughing (mostly at ourselves)! I can tell these friends anything without ever having to worry they will tell someone else, and that most certainly goes the same for me with them. If anything, I am the unpublished Harry Book book titled, The Keeper Of Secrets!
My point to this entire post is to lessen the pressure social media has placed on being involved in a #girlsquad. My hope for those of you who have made it to this part of the post is that you take away the importance of having lifelong friendships and understand the value it adds to your life.
Just know that true life-long friendships can be with those you met in Kindergarten or in #girlsquads or those you may meet tomorrow. Remember, there is no one definitive “place” to meet your life-long friends!